Life's Seasons ...

NOTE: I originally wrote this post as a guest post on Hopefilled-Living April 2, 2012 - Titled Life's April Showers.

As the cold and darkness of winter make way for the warmer, color filled days of spring it is the perfect time to be reminded that no matter the season we may find our lives in, it is only a matter of time before it too changes.

When we find our lives in what seems like and eternity of late Autumn and Winter, it is easy to forget all the wonderful Spring, Summer and early Autumns we were blessed with. And remember the days we find ourselves in - are temporary.They will pass, it is the unknown of exactly when they will end and brighter days begin, that add to the frustration of a situation, and the forgetfulness that they will change.

Sometimes the darkest and coldest days, are the ones that end up helping us to appreciate the good days, but more importantly learn to be more compassionate, loving and caring towards others. These are also the days that when they are replaced with Spring, will help us to stop and actually smell the flowers and try to live in the moment.



Health, marital, parental, loss of a loved one or self, economical, education,family, friends, or co-workers the reason for our dark days are as varied as the length the Winter season of life will last, each time we find ourselves there (yes, ladies ... we will find ourselves there more than once, unfortunately). It's also important to remember that just because someone else had a short (or long) Winter season for similar situation our season is unique to us and thus no two people will experience it the same way.

I'm not an expert on life seasons, and certainly not an expert on getting through the Winter season of life, that is often filled with hurt, anger, pain, depression, frustration, anxiety or (fill in the blank.) But I will share some of the things that have help me to get through some the darkest days of my Winter life season:

image via

Though I'm not religious, I have always had Faith that HE has a plan and Believe this was part of it. I also had to remember to DREAM, of what life may now hold for me. These three things have not always been easy ...  but with the help of family, friends, and even strangers (who have become friends) I have managed to remember FAITH, BELIEVE, DREAM are the foundation to leaving behind the dark days.

1.  Gratitude Journal ~

Each evening before I turn off the lights, I pull out my gratitude journal and write at least ONE THING that I'm thankful for that day. On the days that are very dark, and I can't seem to feel Thankful ... instead of going to sleep without saying thanks ... I will read back over things I have written and am reminded just how much I do have to be thankful for.

2. I Am Loved and Worthy Reminder Notes ~

In the early days of recovery, often the days were only dark and to the point that I often questioned if it would be easier to die than live (Yes, it was horrible not just for me but my family and loved ones to see me at such lows). One of the things that helped was reading how close friends and family felt about me. At the suggestion of a psychologist, I wrote a letter to family and close friends explaining that it would be helpful if they would write a few things about how they felt /saw me, on the enclosed note paper (the size of a square post it note) and mail it back to me in the addressed/stamped envelope. Each person did take a few moments to send encouraging words ~ each one was different and touched on the various facets that made me. When I received these I placed them in a scrapbook ~ and would read them over and over, especially if I felt an episode of heighten depression coming on. They pulled me out of melt downs and on not so dark days - they made me feel loved, cared about and worthy.

3. Bed Day(s)

Sometimes a day or two in bed is exactly what we need. Learning to accept this was equally hard as was getting out of bed on other days.

4. Get Outside

Getting out of the house during the dark Winter season of life can be an overwhelming event. Once outside, breathing in the fresh air and feeling a little breeze or sunshine on your face will help brighten your mood. It wasn't until we got our little Dolce (Yorkie) that getting out to the patio for even 5-10 minutes a day - became more regular.

5. Make Afternoon Tea part of your day

One of my fondest memories is having afternoon tea with friends, when I lived in the city, sometimes at someone's home, though most often at a hotel (Windsor Arms) that served traditional Afternoon Tea. One afternoon I boiled the kettle, plopped a tea bag in a mug and sipped my tea. The warmth of the tea not only warmed my insides, it was like a soothing peace surrounded me. Over time instead of just boiling water and plopping a tea bag into a mug, I decided to search for some of my tea pots.

By using a teapot and strainer I was able to also enjoy loose leaf tea. But the unexpected benefit was sitting quietly while the tea steeped, thinking of only the tea and how wonderful it would feel. Without realizing it for those moments my mind also quieten. I began making Afternoon Tea a part of my day, as often as possible. I even went back dug my teacups out of the storage boxes and set 3 pm - when I'm home and not at or between appointments, that tea is served in our home.

I've set-up a tea trolley and sit here for 15-30 minutes and enjoy looking outside and letting my mind quieten, embracing the warmth and peace I feel during these few minutes in my day.

6. Speak Up

As a very independent woman ... acknowledging that I now was not capable of doing things, that once came so easily... was not easy ...  let alone Asking for help ... words I never even considered to utter. Thankfully for the most part I have been able to put pride/ego aside and now let others help and have even been known  to utter the words "I NEED HELP".

I'd like to be able to say "these" always work or I always implement "these" ... but I am human like you! These are just a few of the things I have found help me weather the Winter of my life. I hope one or two will also help you.

What have you found helps you to weather the Winter's of life?