Invisible Disabilities

Leaving the airport on our recent Paris trip, brought to light just how uneducated Customer Service People can be. As the announcement went over the speakers for persons with small children or needing assistance to please start boarding – Mr. G. and I made our way to the gate. As I approached – the woman at the gate looked me up and down before saying “small children and those needing assistance ONLY” – what made her think that I didn’t need assistance? Had she just taken my boarding pass and punched in my name – she would have discovered that I should be sitting in a wheelchair (however, I always check the distance from check in to gate prior to flying – and if its short or I know it has the people movers, I usually opt to give it a try – I don’t like the looks one gets when being wheeled about or if the airport golf-cart is transporting you around). So, after I pointed out that perhaps she should look at my boarding pass – she looked up- humbly – as I said “yes, I’m suppose to use a wheelchair – and need extra time to get seated”.


After speaking with one of my care team members about this and being informed that many people even with slight visible disabilities encounter these challenges, I decided to look into it a little more. My findings and personal encounters have resulted in this post - for two reasons:

1) let others that may be in a similar situation – know they are not alone!

2) educate people that invisible disabilities exist

People with invisible disabilities look like everyone else, only we struggle to manage everyday life. When it comes to ABI and physical impairments, even when the condition is truly disabling, the average person would not be able to recognize this. Contrary to myth, most disabilities are not apparent to the untrained eye – making the disability effectively known as an “invisible disability”.

For anyone who has an invisible disability life becomes even more challenging, as people often do not give you the help you need. Like the seat on crowed public transit; the help you need in a fitting room; making sure you remember to eat or feed the family pet; make sure you don’t over exert yourself; offer to accompany you shopping; or just offer to come over to sit and keep you company.

Then there is the added anxiety: the seats on public transit that are for disabled or elderly are a wonderful idea, but if someone who looks ‘normal’ sits in them they worry in case an obviously disabled person gets on the bus/subway. Even though they have a Legal Accessible parking permit – parking in an Accessible parking spot and the reaction some people give them can be just as painful as the reason why use of such a spot is required. Asking for help to carry groceries to the car – this one always baffles me – I had one cashier ask me “why do you need help, didn’t you put the groceries in the cart?” –hmm “yes! But they all went in one by one – not altogether in that heavy bag you have now created!” I responded. I really wanted to ask if she had an ABI.

Just because you see someone at the grocery store pushing a cart, don't assume that they're not being truthful about being disabled. For all you really know, after making a short trip to the store, they may be flat on their back when they get home, and in a considerable amount of discomfort. Or just because someone is having a “good day” and has managed to dress themselves stylishly – don’t assume they’re really not injured – Fashionistas are not exempt from ABIs or physical and emotional injuries. You can’t “see” the disability of a person who has depression, anxiety, fibromyalgia or migraines - an invisible disability cannot be seen, but it does exist!

In this day and age, it still really baffles me that a person with a physical disability should have to possess a limp, or a person with an ABI disability should have to carry on a conversation with themselves in public before a non-disabled person can accept that a disability, in fact, exists.