For as long as I can recall I have always been referred to as "petite" both in height (5'2 1/2") ~ yes that half inch matters, just ask any 5' something gal..LOL.~ and body size. In 2006 my weight was steady between 110 - 117 lbs. ; I was wearing a size two, and shopping for clothes, bathing suits, even shoes was a breeze. This had been my normal for the previous 10 or so years. Now this isn't the first time I have mentioned needing to loose a little weight nor the first time I write about the importance of eating/living healthy ~ just in March I wrote about it Here and Here. What is different this time is that for the first time in my life, I'm feeling what it's like to be on the other side of thin; Yup, all 145 lbs of me!
I know what some of you may be thinking ~ "But you have been through so much the past five years"; "You know, when you are forty-something it's not as easy to keep it off"; "Meds, you know, they really make you retain water and put on the weight"; " You know, now you have limits, you really should be grateful you are alive, don't worry ~ IT happens to all of us sooner or later" my personal favourite "You look so healthy, you have gained weight!". Yes, someone (actually 2 persons) have told me the last statement recently. And yes, each statement is true (well the last one, in my opinion I looked very good and healthy before) but I was never one for excuses and well I'm not about to start now. The reality is that I'm not able to be as active I do have some limitations now, and yes meds and perhaps age are contributors; but I just do not feel comfortable. Clothes no longer fit and when I am able to get them on - they certainly don't look like they did even a year ago. I'm no longer comfortable in my own skin, physically and emotionally. This feeling is something I knew about, but it was foreign, unknown , it did not apply to me, until now.
The irony here is that as I made my way through Chic & Slim the original by Anne Barone ( it is a fabulous must read) a bag of Easter jelly beans, you know the yummy sugary ones in the softest of colours, kept some how finding it's way to my hand and these must have been some magic Easter jelly beans ... once close enough jumped from hand to mouth in large groups! Can you believe the nerve, of these little beans?
We have all heard "French women don't get fat" well I can tell you on my trips to Paris I have seen some women who my wonderful friends may refer to as "healthy". But , there is a difference ~ these women are toned, and don't try to hide under sweat suits,
canopy large dresses ~ they remain comfortable in their skin! and what they also have is will power. They may have REALLY enjoyed the holiday menu , but they will not deprive themselves of the foods they love and they will only eat what they truly savour. Before you can blink, they are back to zipping up their little black dress and attending the next holiday affair.
So, looking back on my journey to the other side of thin; there are some obvious contributors that were/are beyond my control, so instead of dwelling on them I am going to work on what I can change.
While growing up in Portugal ... my grandmother would always say "Noa seja gulosa comer so o que voce realmente gosta" when it was time for the dessert table ... in other words don't be greedy and eat all the sweets, eat only what you really enjoy. This style of eating which I learned as a small child had grown with me through my youth and into adulthood, not only with desserts but food as well. So, this my friends is how I'm going to look at food ~ I'm going to ask myself "do I really enjoy this food? and truly savour each bite" in hopes of stopping the revolving door of eating just to eat, which somehow has become the norm. Eating needs to be viewed as part of one's lifestyle, thus it needs to fit accordingly.
Do you eat only what you really enjoy ? and truly savour it ....
or Do you find yourself eating just because it's there?