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Inspiration for living a luxuriously and balanced life

Friday, June 15, 2012

The Other Side Of Thin ~ Part Three

When I started writing The Other Side of Thin series at the end of April I was 145 lbs, by mid May in Part Two of this series I was still maintaining 145 lbs, but was noticing clothes were starting to get a bit more snug, and these were clothes purchased to accommodate my 145 lbs body.By the end of May I started steepping back on the scale regularly (every 2-3 days) to my SHOCK I was bouncing between 150-153 lbs. What Happened? you are asking, well I could say the dry cleaner or dryer shrunk my clothes and "try" to feel better about it. The reality is hosting and attending BBQs, dinners and having house guests for a couple of weeks throughout May all encouraged MORE eating and perhaps an extra glass of wine and extra dessert at meal times.

During their visit my friend V. and I were discussing ~a topic women discuss as the weather gets warmer our weight ~ over breakfast. As I sat there enjoying  couple  a left over pastries from the prior evening, I noticed V. was not having her regular few (2-4) slices of bread with butter and jam! with her coffee. Instead she was happily sipping just on her large cup of coffee with a petite touch of milk. Curious, I asked "Not having bread this morning?" her response was a very matter of fact "I over didn't at dinner last night, I will cut back a little today". At that moment looking at my breakfast plate with only traces of crumbs from the pastries I so happily enjoyed along my morning cereal and large glass of orange juice, I realized THAT is how my French born and raised friend maintains her petite French body.

Of course there is more than just cutting back a little the next day (or two), it's ATTITUDE!

V's response did not have an under tone of guilt (to the prior evenings extra enjoyment) nor was it disgust, it was just reality - to enjoy a little extra - one either cuts back a little the next day OR continues on as always and over time the results start  to show themselves. It's about discipline and being honest (with our self) ~ if we CHOOSE to enjoy a little extra there are consequences. The outcome of these consequences truly is also our choice by either doing nothing, continuing on and making excuses (no time, too tired, too stressed, I have limitations now, can't afford (financially) to eat healthy or exercise..etc) OR by cutting back a little the next day or two.

Here are some steps I have taken to get started

STEP 1 ~  identify your crutch (excuse). Mine have been my acquired limitations post accident, medication, lack of energy. Yes, these are all legitimate and "good" reasons, but they do not change the fact that I no longer feel comfortable in my skin nor do I like the reflection looking back at me in the mirror.

WHAT I"M DOING:  Letting go of the pre-accident Me and Life ~ taking time to mediate each day even if for only 5 or 10 minutes. Strengthening the mind. 

STEP 2 ~ make a commitment. You WILL figure out a way around these obstacles. Think back when you were a child - wanting to reach that cookie jar on the counter - you did not let your lack of height STOP YOU ... like most children you figured out a way to get to the jar and retrieve your prize, the cookie. Now your prize is wanting to feel good in your skin and liking what you see in the mirror.

WHAT I'M DOING: I'm working on building a fitness program around the NEW ME and capabilities. Strengthening the body.

STEP 3 ~ give thanks and give back.When we are feeling less than 100% about ourselves and environment (life) it is so easy to forget to give thanks for ALL that we are given. We also need to remember that as rough as we may see our situation, there is always someone who is in greater need ~ Giving back does not have to be money or any material item. TIME is the one thing we are all capable of giving.

WHAT I'M DOING: Each evening I try to find 5 things (this can be people, pets etc.) in my day that I am thankful for (without repeating a particular thing in the same week), in my Gratitude journal. When I come across someone who is requesting a prayer ~ I add them to my evening prayer book, so that they (or the person they are asking for) are included in my prayers. I'm also looking into volunteering opportunities at our local seniors home and women's shelter. Strengthening the Spirit.

STEP 4 ~ detox our environment. It is important to have a good look at things that may be holding you back (other than yourself) from moving forward, this could be an object or even a person(s). Yes, things that trigger or affect you in any negative way - need to be removed, perhaps your closet is bursting with size 2 clothes while you are now a size 10 or more.Seeing these items become a constant reminder of what you no longer are, this thought continues to manifest as you are not a size 2 ~ and guess what ...as long as you are thinking that way you will not even come close to size 2 again.  People (especially other women - and I don't know why this is) can be triggers or affect you negatively ~ if someone in your life     no matter what, is never happy, speakings ill or constantly criticizes other people, their glass is always half empty, someone is doing something "they are not happy" if that person "is not doing that thing" they still are not happy. Hearing constant negative words, will not only drain your energy it pollutes your mind with negative thoughts.

WHAT I'M DOING: I've stopped trying to rescue everyone I meet. If someone is sharing a negative situation in their life and they are actually wanting a listening ear, so they themselves can move on from the situation or if they are genuinely looking for help and making changes to their situation I will listen. But if they are just speaking to hear themselves speak, I slowly distance myself ... if they continue I completely distance myself. Regular readers of this blog know the challenges we have faced with Mr. G's family ~ therefore we have completely distant ourselves from the toxic family members. If you think of someone and DRAMA comes to mind ..run!!!  I have also removed all size 2 clothing from my closet and other clothing that does not fit (except 2-3 pieces - I will speak of them in a later post). Strengthening Self love and respect, setting boundaries.

We seek expert advice for everything from travel to what shampoo works best, yet when it comes to our body, mind, and spirit we try to do it on our own. Along with these 4 steps it's important to seek help with things that we are not experts in.  In a future post I will be writing about the people that can be a great resource to help us achieve our goal.


  1. Dearest Celia,

    Wow, a positive about a negative... I woke up with severe cramping in my feet. So I did check my laptop and found YOU... Well, your post of course but it is YOU shining through. That gives me some time to sit down, relax and read. This is a handful but there are so many elements in it that yes, we must look at all those elements.
    When I was being paralyzed and loosing weight and weight and weight I remember a doctor friend who said the following. For good health the body and mind have to be in perfect harmony, have to be in balance. But this proves also that step 4 is the hardest part of it.
    Let's all try hard and meditate on the positive. Thanks for sharing all this.
    Love to you and yours,

    1. Dearest Mariette; My glass is half full again .. :) after all the rain, and I so want to help others, for me that is motivation to stay true to me and on track (though like everyone I am human ...so not always 100%).

      Mother Nature's rain is great for the gardens but plays havoc on limbs - especially anyone who has gone through what you and I have.I hope the weather is moving into sunshine for you!

      Sending you and Pieter hugs, warm thoughts and blessings for a perfect week-end to enjoy your beautiful gardens. xo C. (HHL)

    2. Dearest Celia,
      Did not mention it above but we were in Miami at the time I wrote this... A mini-vacation of 5 nights at the Hyatt House (full apartment style hotel!). We loved the palm trees, the sun, the pool, and our dear friends that we got to visit. Now I'm tired of course from the journey home in 2 days. We break it up with a stop at Hyatt Place on the way over and on the way back for covering the 1,000 km one way.
      We had lots of rain here in Georgia, good for the garden!
      Love to you and stay well.

  2. Very very true. Guilt, self loathing and self hate can do more damage to a person's self esteem causing them to give up or become depressed - in the long run having a piece (or two) of cheese cake and being happy about it, would be far less devastating then beating one's self up later.
    That said - moderation is key!
    I am at the beginning of my journey back to me - I also want to be happy in my skin. ;)

    1. You will get there my friend ... stay positive (I know it's difficult at times).But it's important to realize that we are human and we will slip up now in then. I'm trying to look at the "slip ups" as just a single event and not let it become a mountain. Sounds like you are on the right path!! xo HHL

  3. My partner and I need to watch ourselves to know when to cut back and when to offer support. I don't know if this is the place to offer general advice, but one of the most helpful choices we've made is to avoid processed foods. While it's strange--If I personally make the bread or pastries or cookies, I can eat a few without issue; but if I purchase such things from the store or a restaurant, it appears instantly on the thighs (or it seems like it).

    Being passionate about something is my greatest resource for maintaining a certain size. Photography, work, cooking (yes, even cooking) . . . these generate such energetic, happy feelings that the dispel negativity.

    Good luck!

    1. YES!! YES! thank you for sharing what works for you , as it may something that will help another reader. The more positive things we can read about the better options we all have to choose from , and in turn discover what works for us.

      You are absolutely correct .. processed foods so be avoided whenever possible. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. Your comment is perfect timing for me and I'm certain many others.

      Wishing you a great week-end..xo HHL

  4. You are amazing.... unique!!! I don't need to say anymore.... I know you know...
    Lots of love angel.

    1. Thank you for writing this blog...I was an executive in financial services in Toronto and thought I was living the dream...the car, the house, the vacations,the clothes and the shoes. But then I got diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and my life changed...not just physically but emotionally as well and what I have struggled most with is emotionally having one foot in my old life and one foot in this new life and not being able to make peace with this life and the extra weight I put on because of my MS but your advice about getting rid of clothes that no longer fit nor represent the life I have now was a real breakthrough for me in being able to leave my old life behind and although I miss those beautiful clothes and shoes, they don't make sense in this life and they are just clothes...focusing on my health, my family and my friends are what is most important...thank you again...I look forward to continue reading your blog and getting more inspiration on how to lose my extra weight!!!!

  5. What an amazing and inspiring post Celia. (and wow to the commenter above! amazing!)
    I totally do what your french visitor does...if I go crazy one night, I pretty much starve myself the next day. Not quite but I am super careful. It works for me and makes me feel less guilty when I overindulge.

  6. Hi Celia,
    I just wanted to come over and say "hi!" Sending ((((hugs))) your way,

  7. Hi! A wonderful post. Comming by to say Hi! I think I am going to have to start watching my weight more,& I have a thyroid problem so it is always a bit harder for me to loose.
    Keep positive.
    Have a good week end.

  8. I've had to distance myself from a toxic family member too. So sad but so unhealthy to be around her. I totally get it. Sometimes it is necessary. xo

  9. Oh Celia...I so needed to read this today (after eating pizza at 10pm last night!)...

    Sigh....it sucks doesn't it...

    No more excuses, you are right, and MERCI for the encouragement my dear...

    I started off the summer with big convictions, and lost a few like you...then got depressed that it was only a few ( not like my reults would have been a few years ago), and said to h--- with it...and oh dear am worse than when I started.

    We can do this!


    Thanks for the inspiration my dear! You know, Gwyneth looks amazing, but I knew her from when she was a teen, and she was a tall beanpole then....and both of her parents are long and lean...not to say she doesn't reap the rewards of her discipline....BUT I'm just saying, we don't all have the long and lean gene! BUT we can be healthy and feel fit and fine...and wear our clothes without snugness :)

    xoxox Enjoy your weekend and the sunshine,

  10. Celia, how encouraging to read this tonight -- after I spent the weekend removing all clothes that didn't fit from my closet! It's a bit frustrating to have to let some things go for no other reason that extra weight, but it's time. Now I can focus on losing those extra pounds and feeling comfortable in my own skin again. Good luck to both of us!


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