When I started writing
The Other Side of Thin series at the end of April I was 145 lbs, by mid May in
Part Two of this series I was still maintaining 145 lbs, but was noticing clothes were starting to get a bit more snug, and these were clothes purchased to accommodate my 145 lbs body.By the end of May I started steepping back on the scale regularly (every 2-3 days) to my SHOCK I was bouncing between 150-153 lbs.
What Happened? you are asking, well I could say the dry cleaner or dryer shrunk my clothes and "try" to feel better about it. The reality is hosting and attending BBQs, dinners and having house guests for a couple of weeks throughout May all encouraged
MORE eating
and perhaps an extra glass of wine and extra dessert at meal times.
During their visit my friend V. and I were discussing ~
a topic women discuss as the weather gets warmer our weight ~ over breakfast. As I sat there enjoying
couple a left over pastries from the prior evening, I noticed V. was not having her regular few (2-4) slices of bread with butter and jam! with her coffee. Instead she was happily sipping just on her large cup of coffee with a petite touch of milk. Curious, I asked
"Not having bread this morning?" her response was a very matter of fact
"I over didn't at dinner last night, I will cut back a little today". At that moment looking at my breakfast plate with only traces of crumbs from the pastries I so happily enjoyed along my morning cereal and large glass of orange juice, I realized THAT is how my French born and raised friend maintains her petite French body.
Of course there is more than just cutting back a little the next day (or two), it's
ATTITUDE!
V's response did not have an under tone of guilt (to the prior evenings extra enjoyment) nor was it disgust, it was just reality - to enjoy a little extra - one either cuts back a little the next day OR continues on as always and over time the results start to show themselves. It's about
discipline and
being honest (with our self) ~ if we CHOOSE to enjoy a little extra there are consequences. The outcome of these consequences truly is also our choice by either doing nothing, continuing on and making excuses (no time, too tired, too stressed, I have limitations now, can't afford (financially) to eat healthy or exercise..etc) OR by cutting back a little the next day or two.
Here are some steps I have taken to get started
STEP 1 ~ identify your crutch (excuse). Mine have been my acquired limitations post accident, medication, lack of energy. Yes, these are all legitimate and "good" reasons, but they do not change the fact that I no longer feel comfortable in my skin nor do I like the reflection looking back at me in the mirror.
WHAT I"M DOING: Letting go of the pre-accident Me and Life ~ taking time to mediate each day even if for only 5 or 10 minutes.
Strengthening the mind.
STEP 2 ~ make a commitment. You
WILL figure out a way around these obstacles. Think back when you were a child - wanting to reach that cookie jar on the counter - you did not let your lack of height STOP YOU ... like most children you figured out a way to get to the jar and retrieve your prize, the cookie. Now your
prize is wanting to
feel good in your skin and
liking what you see in the mirror.
WHAT I'M DOING: I'm working on building a fitness program around the NEW ME and capabilities.
Strengthening the body.
STEP 3 ~ give thanks and give back.When we are feeling less than 100% about ourselves and environment (life) it is so easy to forget to give thanks for ALL that we are given. We also need to remember that as rough as we may see our situation, there is always someone who is in greater need ~ Giving back does not have to be money or any material item. TIME is the one thing we are all capable of giving.
WHAT I'M DOING: Each evening I try to find 5 things (this can be people, pets etc.) in my day that I am thankful for (without repeating a particular thing in the same week), in my Gratitude journal. When I come across someone who is requesting a prayer ~ I add them to my evening prayer book, so that they (or the person they are asking for) are included in my prayers. I'm also looking into volunteering opportunities at our local seniors home and women's shelter.
Strengthening the Spirit.
STEP 4 ~ detox our environment. It is important to have a good look at things that may be holding you back (other than yourself) from moving forward, this could be an object or even a person(s). Yes, things that trigger or affect you in any negative way - need to be removed, perhaps your closet is bursting with size 2 clothes while you are now a size 10 or more.Seeing these items become a constant reminder of what you no longer are, this thought continues to manifest as you are not a size 2 ~ and guess what ...as long as you are thinking that way you will not even come close to size 2 again. People (especially other women - and I don't know why this is) can be triggers or affect you negatively ~ if someone in your life no matter what, is never happy, speakings ill or constantly criticizes other people, their glass is always half empty, someone is doing something "they are not happy" if that person "is not doing that thing" they still are not happy. Hearing constant negative words, will not only drain your energy it pollutes your mind with negative thoughts.
WHAT I'M DOING: I've stopped trying to rescue everyone I meet. If someone is sharing a negative situation in their life and they are actually wanting a listening ear, so they themselves can move on from the situation or if they are genuinely looking for help and making changes to their situation I will listen. But if they are just speaking to hear themselves speak, I slowly distance myself ... if they continue I completely distance myself. Regular readers of this blog know the challenges we have faced with Mr. G's family ~ therefore we have completely distant ourselves from the toxic family members. If you think of someone and DRAMA comes to mind ..run!!! I have also removed all size 2 clothing from my closet and other clothing that does not fit (except 2-3 pieces - I will speak of them in a later post).
Strengthening Self love and respect, setting boundaries.
We seek expert advice for everything from travel to what shampoo works best, yet when it comes to our body, mind, and spirit we try to do it on our own. Along with these 4 steps it's important to seek help with things that we are not experts in. In a future post I will be writing about the people that can be a great resource to help us achieve our goal.
Changes occur in our lives; marriage, death of a loved one, divorce, traumatic event(s), illness, parenting, shifts in friendship, career loss, the list of possible events that may alter the path we thought we were on is endless. Though different and unique to each person/life these events do have one common denominator (whether expected or unexpected) they will result in sending one's life into transition.
