The Healing Begins ~ Mondays...Part Three

After the “warm” (click here to read previous) welcome Mr. G’s cousins extended, during our trip to his farm, many questions danced through my head: Why is that they cannot accept Mr. G moving on with his life? Are they not happy that he is still alive? The most recurring question was, How can they treat their own flesh and blood, with so much disrespect after all he had suffered and lost? He was the one who had lost his spouse, yet these people made it all about themselves.

It was at times like these that I wished my head could focus and work like it use to. Of course I did not share the above thoughts and questions with Mr. G. , I tried to get him to forgive them for their hurtful words and actions and move forward to understanding that they must not be at peace with something within themselves. Yet, each time he tried to reach out to them and extend an olive branch, he would return more battered and bruised by their words. His hurt and heart heavier than each time before.

I felt so helpless in my ability to help Mr. G. he had helped me through so much, but my focus had to remain on my rehabilitation and I could not allow for any distractions. I was fortunate to have the love and support of my own family and friends, who made me, realize the situation with Mr. G’s family actually was not about me, but about him and the lack of respect his family had for him. Interestingly enough I would come to learn that this was something that Angel P had often voiced as a concern to Mr. G. at various times during their relationship and marriage, even weeks prior to her horrible accident.

In the months that followed things did not become any easier for Mr. G. His family, the people who were suppose to love him unconditionally, protect him, and support him, were instead isolating and pushing him away (they of course called their words, actions and behavior ~ LOVE for him). The love for his family made their actions and words that much more heart breaking for him. My heart went out to him not only because I loved and cared for him but also as a friend. I had never experienced nor witnessed such hatred in people, especially by someone’s own family.

The confirmation that God gives you what you need, was never more evident than in the love, support and understanding Angel P’s family gave (and continues to this day) Mr. G. It would be Angel P’s family who would keep him alive through the incomprehensible emotional abuse at the hands of his own family, who for some reason seemed to remain more concerned with what 3-4 cousins and strangers thought was right, than with Mr. G’s happiness and willingness to stay alive.

The year 2008 was coming to an end and with it so many endings and beginnings. I was adapting to my artificial elbow; Mr. G. with the love and support of Angel P’s family was starting to truly grow and come alive again; the renovations on the house, though not progressing as quickly as anticipated ,was slowly transforming it from a place of refuge, from so many painful hurts and memories in our respective lives,  to our home.

What I want to share with others ~

There are many uneducated (not scholastically ~ but about being human) people, who will try to negatively influence the opinions of others about you. They prey on the weak trying to keep them down. Stay strong, do not allow TOXIC PEOPLE to distract you from healing and fill you with hatered, instead wish them peace within themselves and their lives.

There is no book you can open that will give you the outcome of a specific situation. One thing is certain on this road of life we have many lessons to learn and without the various detours, pains, questions, and tests of faith we would not evolve into the souls we are meant to be.